Luke’s Notebook

Back in September of 1999, the four oldest guys (that’s Paul, John, Mark, and myself) drove south to meet up with a couple of our aunts who had rented a condo in Destin, Florida, and had invited us to join them for the weekend.

That trip was extremely memorable, for a number of reasons.  For one, it was the first time any of the Arndt guys had visited the ocean (technically the Gulf).  It was also my first time in Florida.

One really sweet memory I have from that trip is, very simply, the purchase of a CD.  I believe I was given a little bit of money to spend while down there, and we stopped by a Christian book store.  For some reason — and I really couldn’t tell you why — I found this CD and wanted to buy it.

I can’t even remember what reason, if any, I had to buy the “Better Is One Day” CD.  I don’t think I had heard of Passion before, and I’m pretty sure that was my first time seeing that CD.   Something just drew me to it.  It could have been as simple or nondramatic as the attractive cover art and the neat “P.”  I really don’t remember why I picked it up in the first place.

Well, that was my introduction to Passion music.  Since then, I have come to learn about the Passion conferences, how they are gatherings geared towards college kids in order to have them fall more in love with Jesus.

I fell in love with that album.  I listened to it over and over.  Back then, our music library was pretty sparse, so this CD got a lot of playing time.   Even though it didn’t have a tremendous amount of competition at the time, it was by far my favorite CD.  It just had some beautiful songs on it, such as “Knowing You,” “You Are My King,” “To Speak Your Name,” “Better Is One Day,” “The Heart Of Worship,” and “Agnus Dei.”

As the years went on, and as I could afford it, I would buy the newer Passion offerings — “Our Love Is Loud,” “Sacred Revolution,” “The Road To OneDay,” “OneDay Live,” “How Great Is Our God,” “Everything Glorious,” “God Of This City,” and even their “Hymns” project.

If you were to ask me to pick a favorite out of those albums, I don’t think I could do it.  I love “Better Is One Day” not only for the songs I listed but because it was my first Passion CD, my introduction to their music.  But each new CD would come with a fresh batch of worship songs that I would quickly love and come to know by heart.  Each album has its own flavor, but there are just beautiful, passionate songs found in all the recordings.

I think what hooked me on the Passion CDs is that I didn’t feel like I was listening to a performance, but was instead joining the worship of God.  And that really can be kind of rare.  There are a lot of great songs out there, and a lot of great performers, but this is the type of thing that shouldn’t be performed.  It’s not a “Hey, look at us” type of approach.  It’s people who passionately love God and who want to glorify Him singing, and there just happens to be a microphone present.  I mean, obviously they recorded this intentionally and there is production value, but my point is that the feeling I get when listening to most of these songs is one that makes me think of God and how awesome He is, rather than how talented the performer is.

I’m sure part of the reason I rave so much about Passion is sentimental.  I was 14 when I bought the first CD, and their music has been around during some major parts of my life.  But I think there is something special about the albums.  I don’t want to romanticize it too much or try to overspiritualize it.  I’ll just say that these albums have played a key role in me growing in Jesus, in cultivating a heart of worship.

They kind of work as a great tenderizer, so to speak, to keep me from getting too hardened or stale by ordinary, everyday life.  They work as almost a fail-safe method to get me back to Square One — to fall in love with Jesus, realizing who I am and who He is; marveling over God’s incredible — just incredible — love for me, despite my sin; and trying to comprehend His majesty.

It’s stuff that blows my mind, to think of how great He is.  And then to learn that He loves me — and even likes me!  I pray I never lose this passion!

My baby sister is a teenager.

I can’t believe that!

Could it really have been 13 years since she was born?

It is so hard to believe that here we are.  Wizzy is a teenager.

While all of the chubs are special and very loved, I have to admit that Mary holds a very special role.  People always ask me if she is spoiled or if she doesn’t fit in.  I answer that while she is definitely not spoiled — that is, she has jobs and responsibilities just like everyone else — she is most certainly treasured.

I always have loved my little brothers, but I’ve got to admit that Wizzy did something special to me.  I guess she softened me up quite a bit.

Now that she is turning into a young lady, it is a little bittersweet.  It’s sad to see the “baby” Wizzy fade, but it is amazing to see what kind of beautiful young lady she is turning out to be.  She is so mature, so selfless, so sweet.  She really is a leader.  I’m so proud of her.

I’m so thankful that God allowed me to be this close with the family for this long, because I get to witness these milestones and the once-in-a-lifetime transitions.

One unexpected side effect of having Mary around is that she has helped me keep a high standard in what kind of girl I would be interested in.  See, I realize that whoever I would marry would be several years older than my sister, and I would love to be able to encourage Wizzy to look up to her, where I could confidently say, “Go ahead and dress like she does, act like she does, watch what she watches,” and so on.

So I am really praying that if I get married, God will provide someone who would be a perfect role model for Wizzy, where I can safely tell her, “There!  Be just like her.”  I have got to believe there are such women out there!  There may not necessarily be an abundance of them currently, but all I need is one.

And, in the interim, my goal is to try to personally live up to the standard of the kind of guy that I would recommend for Wizzy.  That is a challenge.   I love Wizzy so much, and I only want the best for her.  Whoever I would marry would also be somebody’s little girl, somebody’s sister.  She would also be a treasure, and I need to work hard to be worthy of her, just like I would expect a guy to meet a high standard in order to deserve Wizzy.

We’re still a ways off from all of that, thankfully.  She is only 13, so we needn’t get too worried just yet. But bottom line… she’s my Number One girl.  The Arndt Family has never been the same after January 5 of 1997.  I’m so blessed to have such a wonderful little sister.  Even though she may technically be a teenager now, I have a feeling that she is going to still be my baby Wizzy for quite some time.

I wanted to make sure to wrap up the posts about the family trip, as 2009 is nearly over and I don’t want to be too far behind!

I left off on Week Two, where Mark and I were home covering some work.  At the beginning of Week Three, Mark and I drove north towards Chicago as the rest of the family left the home in UP, Michigan, to drive through the mainland of Michigan.  As they were driving southeast through Michigan, John drove due south towards Chicago, and the three of us met up — at Six Flags!

Conveniently, Six Flags was almost the precise halfway point between our home and the vacation house in Michigan.  So the three of us met up in the Six Flags parking lot, spent a few hours on some of the rides there — specifically, the Raging Bull, the American Eagle, King Chaos, and the Iron Wolf.

After a few hours at Six Flags, we all drove over to the nearby Golden Corral in Gurnee and ate supper.  When finished, Mark and I said farewell to John, and we drove east towards Michigan, while John continued south in order to get home.

Mark and I met up with the family late that night, and we all stayed in Milan, Michigan, just outside of Ann Arbor.  The next day, we caravanned up to Penn Yan, New York, which was where we would stay the rest of the week.

While in Penn Yan, we did some canoeing, some biking, and worked a lot on a few long jobs that we had to take care of.  At the end of Week Three, Mark and I would hit the road again, while the rest of the family would drive over to the Gettysburg, Pennyslvania, area.

On our way home, Mark and I decided to swing by Pittsburgh.  We had never been there, so we decided to take the small detour in order to drive through it.  I’m glad we did, too!  It’s a very nice-looking town, and I especially liked the Pirates’ ballpark, PNC Park, which rests on the riverfront.  Unfortunately, we didn’t have time to stop in Pittsburgh, but it was nice to drive through it and get a very brief tour.

We arrived home in the early-morning hours of Saturday, November 7th.  Later that day, I had a wedding ceremony/reception to film for a client of ours.

John was still home at this time, and the three of us spent the next week taking care of business-related duties.  Towards the end of Week Four, though, John and I drove back up to Penn Yan, New York (by way of Bellville, Ohio, where we stayed a night), and rejoined the family for what would be the final week of the trip for everybody.  Mark stayed back home to man the business.

Everybody left the house on Keuka Lake in New York on Thursday morning, November 19.  Most of the family headed home, while Jude and I drove over to nearby Buffalo, as we just happened to have some deposition work come in for a couple of days over there.  We spent all day Thursday working, and after pulling a near-all-nighter (working on transcripts until 3:00 AM or so), we got to sleep.  We woke up around 11:30 in the morning, checked out of the hotel, and headed for home.

We finally pulled into our driveway early on Saturday, November 21st.  Finally, everybody was home from the trip, from all different directions, safe and sound.

It was a very busy trip!  Lots of work, but lots of fun also.  It was a relief to get back home, to sleep in my bed, and to get back to everyday duties.

We had many different surprises while on the trip.  Plenty of unexpected work, which is always a good thing, but it had left us scrambling to cover things.  Thankfully, we managed.  We also saw on multiple occasions how impeccable God’s timing is, in very practical ways.  It’s almost like He was giving us a thumbs-up for taking the trip.

It really was an amazing experience.  To be honest, I was thrilled to be back home, as things are so much simpler when you are in your own house.  Plus, I needed to get away from the tempting junk food that was so easily accessible during the trip.  Extra snacks minus regular workouts equals a bad result!  So it was nice to get back to eating better and getting back in the habit of working out.

The 2009 Family Trip is definitely one that will be very memorable, for many different reasons!  It’s funny how each trip has its own distinct flavor.  You can never predict what the story of a trip will be beforehand.  It makes things really exciting, because you just never quite know what to expect.

Week Number Two of the trip was pretty interesting!

Mark and I left the home in Michigan early Sunday morning (October 18th), and we started south.  This trip home was very memorable for a few reasons.  One, we drove through Green Bay, Wisconsin, and decided to hop off the highway in order to drive past Lambeau Field, home of the Packers.

It was really awesome to see Lambeau!  Green Bay is not very large, and we didn’t even see anything that looked like a city — that is, anything of substance — so it is quite a bit different than most other professional sports stadiums.

We also saw thousands of people tailgating all around the stadium, as we were  there a couple hours prior to kickoff.  In addition to the tailgaters, we drove by a nearby neighborhood, where dozens of people were offering parking in their driveways or on their lawns!  Some houses had up to 10 or 20 cars packed into a front (or back) yard.  It was really funny to see!  I guess it’s a good idea, really.  Brings in a little bit of extra money on game days for the homeowners.

As we continued south, we drove through Milwaukee, and ended up stopping at Six Flags Great America just north of Chicago, in Gurnee, Illinois.  We spent a few hours there, although we only managed to get on two rides during that time, as it was pretty crowded.  We did fit in two of the best roller coasters, though — Superman and the Raging Bull.

The rest of the drive home was pretty uneventful.  To help pass the time, Mark and I listened to an audio book, “The Red House Mystery” by A. A. Milne.  It was actually very, very good, and it helped pass many of the hours on the road.

We arrived back home a couple hours after midnight on Monday the 19th.  On Monday, Mark had an early-morning deposition in St. Louis.  I spent most of the day taking care of assorted business-related tasks.

The rest of the week was pretty much a blur, as Mark and I both had an abnormally-large amount of work.  Mark had eight depositions to report, and I had six video depos that week.  That’s pretty much unheard of!  Also in that week back home, we played in a softball game, and had dinner with both sets of grandparents on two different nights.

On Sunday the 25th, we were back on the road, driving northward in order to rejoin the family.

Stay tuned for Week Three!

When weight-lifting, one of the more common exercises we tend to focus on bench-pressing.  It’s a real good workout for the chest muscles and the upper body as a whole.

With bench-pressing heavy weights, it is always a good idea to have a spotter who will be ready to help you lift the barbell in case you aren’t able to push it up on your own.  It sure beats the alternative of being pinned on the bench under a heavy weight.

Sometimes, I will get a little too ambitious, and try to lift something that I have no real chance of putting up.  Before long, I chirp “Help.”  I might not even get the weight up five or 10 percent of the way.

There are other times, though, when I am so — so close – to pushing the weight up, yet I need assistance to get me over the top.  I might be 95 percent of the way there, yet I just don’t have it in me to close the deal.

Those second times end up being the most frustrating, because I was extremely close to having done it all on my own, without help from anyone.  It’s sad to have to get help at that point, because I am just inches from accomplishing it on my own.

While this is a good approach when it comes to weight-lifting, often I find myself starting to use the same way of thinking when it comes to my sin and God’s mercy.

It’s easy to assume that I’m just inches away from perfection.  If only I could be a little more disciplined, a little more patient, a little gentler.  Patch a couple of occasional holes, and we’re good to go.  I’d be totally perfect, and wouldn’t need help from anybody!

But what I fail to realize is that, even on my absolute best day, I am STILL falling well short of God’s standard.  I’m never even CLOSE to where I should be.

It’s not that I’m just an inch away from getting that weight back on the bar; instead, the weight is an inch away from squashing me completely.

Isaiah 64:6:

“And all our righteous acts are like filthy rags.”

Even on a record day for me, it’s still pitiful compared to what God has required of me.  It’s like trying to leap across a canyon.  I may jump five feet on one day, eight on a better day, but either way I’m not landing anywhere near that other edge.

So this could be discouraging, to realize that I’m actually much, much worse than I thought.  But it actually is very freeing for me, because it forces me to cling to Jesus for everything.  I realize that I just have absolutely no chance without His help.  I’m not even close on my own.  Without the blood of Jesus covering my sins, I’m toast, even on my very best days.

While perfection still is and still should be the goal, remembering this does help me deal with all my imperfections.  This doesn’t cause me to want to relax the standard at all.  Instead, I am so thankful for all that I have been forgiven of and the great mercy I’m experiencing every day, and I just want to show my gratitude by striving to please God more and more.

This also reinforces just how patient God is with me.  He doesn’t constantly remind me, “Hey, Luke, now just remember:  You are a wretch, and don’t you forget it!”  No… instead, He is always reminding me how much He likes me.  He’s almost saying, “Relax.  You weren’t ever even close.  But I still love you anyway!”  It helps me not beat myself up too much whenever my human tendencies or weaknesses start to show.

This, obviously, is no Get-Out-Of-Jail-Free card or an excuse to sin.  I still want to do all I can to be obedient in every way.  But it is very reassuring to know that, on my own, I never even had a chance to begin with.  It’s mercy, it has always been mercy, and that’s my only hope in the future, is more mercy.

Our 2009 family trip began on Sunday, October 11.  The entire family, minus Paul and John, hit the road and started driving north around noon.  The destination was a rental house near Iron River, Michigan.  We had about 600 miles to drive in the day.

We took a brief drive through downtown Chicago, which was about the halfway mark.  We stopped by Wrigley Field, which was pretty special!  Along the way, we also stopped at a few lighthouses.  In the early-morning hours of Monday the 12th, we arrived at the house in Michigan.

This was the first time any of us had been to the Upper Peninsula, and it was very interesting!  A very scenic area, and not much in the way of big cities.

I spent many hours at the McDonald’s in Iron River, as we happened to be in the midst of transferring FamTeam to a new server.  The Internet service was extremely sketchy at the house, and McDonald’s was one of the nearest places that had wireless Internet, so it became the go-to spot.  I would have rather have taken care of all of the FamTeam stuff back home, but the timing just worked out to where it had to be taken care of while we were on the road.  Thankfully, the FamTeam switchover went pretty well.  Honestly, I was amazed at how smoothly it all went.  What a relief it was to have all that taken care of!

On one day trip, we drove to the northern shore and spent some time on the beach of Lake Superior in Marquette, Michigan.  We had a gorgeous sunny day, and we had a good time moseying up and down the shore.  We also spent another day visiting a waterfall, and yet another day trip visiting the scenic Porcupine Mountains.

Paul and John rejoined the family early Saturday, October 17th.  They had spent the week back home in order to take care of some work, and they had hit the road at the end of the work day on Friday and drove through the night.  They had actually stopped at Six Flags Chicago for about an hour during their drive up, and were able to ride a few roller coasters before getting back on the road.

October 17 was a very special day, because it ended up being the only day in which the entire family was together, because Mark and I would soon head back home in order to take care of things back home for the second week of the trip.

On that Saturday that John and Paul had arrived, all 16 of us drove northeast to Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore.  We didn’t get to stay there very long, as it was a seven- or eight-hour round trip.  We did, however, get to view a few very pretty lookout points, and John and I had a chance to run down a mile-long trail that led to the beach.  It was a tiring run, as we were hurrying there and back in order to not keep the family waiting too long.  We were out of breath quite a few times during the sprints, it was a worthwhile trip!

Saturday night, Mark and I spent our final hours with the family before driving back home early Sunday morning.

And that’s… where we stop for now. The drive home was quite fun!  That will be covered in Part #2.  For now, though… this concludes Week Number One of the 2009 family trip!

Colossians 3:15:

“And be thankful.”

Where can I start?

God has given me so much to be thankful for that it’s almost embarrassing when I start to think about everything.  First, I am forgiven.  Jesus has taken my sin; God sees me as pure.  God loves me.  And He likes me.  God is providing and leading, day by day.  I’m so thankful that He is trustworthy.  Unfailing — unable to fail.  Just amazing!

On top of that, I have this family.  I mean, how in the world could I have ever earned this?  It’s not fair.  I don’t deserve it.  But I am so grateful that I somehow find myself in the middle of it.

I have a two-pronged plan.  One, to THANK God for the blessings, the provisions, the mercy, the guidance — everything that He has done and that He continues to do.  Secondly, I’m praying that God would help me not lose this thankful heart.  It is so easy to take things for granted.  I do it way too often.  If I could only be wise enough to see everything around me, and really appreciate the countless things that I tend to overlook most of the time.  I really should be constantly overwhelmed in realizing just how good I have it.

Happy Thanksgiving, everybody!

This evening, I went to the YMCA for the first time in quite a while.  I must have been away for about two months, perhaps even longer.  Of course, we just returned from our long family trip (which I still am hoping to write about, by the by), so obviously it wasn’t that easy to work out over the past several weeks.

Anyway, tonight I managed to drag myself to the YMCA.  It was a pretty typical situation for me in deciding to go:  First, I consider going.  Then, I think, “Ehh… well, I do have some work to do…”  Finally — thankfully — I decide to just throw myself in the car, and go.  And, as usual, I left the Y thrilled that I made myself actually go and work out.

It’s funny how that works.  You would think that I would realize by now that the workouts are worth the discomfort, and thus always be excited to go exercise.  You’d think!  But I guess I’m just not that smart, or my memory isn’t that good.  Either way, it doesn’t reflect real well on me, I suppose.

Tonight was sort of the official kickoff to my off-season workout program.  There is no official regimen that I have, other than to try to work out a lot — burn calories and lift weights.  Immediately, I hope to drop a couple of these fresh vacation pounds before they have a chance to get too comfortable, but my long-term goal is to just to get a little stronger, a little faster, a little leaner.  Seems like a good plan.

It’s always exciting to start something new like this.  I have five months before the 2010 softball season begins, and I know that that is a lot of time, and if I really make the most of the opportunities, I can improve quite a bit by next April!

Unfortunately… tonight, I hit a snag.  In weight-lifting, I started to feel the familiar pain in my left arm.  It’s the same pain that I was having throughout most of the 2008 softball season and pretty much all of 2009.  I am nearly positive it is a result of throwing the ball.  I must have injured it initially in early 2008, and it just never fully healed.  There would be good days and bad days, but it seemed like the pain wasn’t going away.

I can’t say that I was anticipating this, but now that I think about it, it shouldn’t really surprise me.   A few months ago, when I was last working out, I was having similar issues.  And even in the recent weeks, in throwing a baseball, softball, or football, I would often feel the pain return.

To be honest, I am pretty disappointed.  The arm pain itself isn’t really that bad, but it is  enough to limit me when lifting weights.  Also, it is discouraging to have the same problem that I had back in 2008, with no real improvement.

To be fair, I don’t know that I have ever given the arm a real rest for any long period of time.  I mean, when I think about it, I went from playing softball three nights of week all through the spring, summer, and fall of 2008, to working out pretty heavily and playing volleyball over the winter months of 2008.  In 2009, I continued to play volleyball and work out until softball began, and then I was playing four or five softball games a week until the fall.  Even on this trip, being away from home for a few weeks, I couldn’t resist the urge to break out my glove or throw a football around.

I would be pretty thrilled if I learned that my arm would completely heal itself if I would just let it rest completely for a while.  It would be hard to abstain from lifting weights or playing volleyball, but I think it would be a worthy sacrifice in order to let the arm recover.

The problem is, I don’t think that would work.  But, perhaps I just never gave the arm a long-enough break to recover fully.

I think I will break down and have a doctor look at the situation.  The pain hasn’t ever been bad enough or disabling enough to really warrant anything like that.  I mean, I have still been able to play ball, and still have been able to work out.  There has been pain, but it would always go away eventually.

The thing I want to avoid, if possible, is entering 2010 with the exact same problem.  I would like to finally know just what is going on, and what is needed to resolve this.

I feel kind of silly writing a long post all about something as trivial as a little arm pain, especially when it’s the type of pain that can be avoided if I simply wouldn’t do certain things.  But this type of stuff means a lot to me, and I would have a hard time sitting out softball games or missing the chance to exercise.

Offhand, it does seem like the smartest thing to do would be to see a specialist, who can help me determine just what exactly is going on.  Once that mystery is uncovered, things will probably make a lot more sense.  Right now, it is just frustrating to have this intermittent pain on my inner elbow, yet not knowing exactly what it is.  Is something torn?  Strained?  Does it need rest?  Physical therapy?  Surgery?

If you would, please keep me in your prayers in regards to this situation.  I just need wisdom on what to do.   I want to be humble enough to just wait things out for a while, if that’s the best medicine.  At the same time, though, I don’t want to be too passive if I am supposed to be proactively doing stuff to rehabilitate the arm.  I’m just not smart enough to figure it out on my own!

Thanks for the prayers.  I really appreciate them!  God is so loving and has such perfect precision with everything that He does.  I know that, whatever is going on here and whatever is going to happen, that He is not going to be surprised, and He has a perfect plan here!

Wow.

This has been a special, special trip!

So much happened.  So many great memories.  Some crazy moments, and some relaxing moments.  Waking up at 5:30 AM one day, 11:30 AM the next.  Work, fun.  Work, fun.

This will take a long time to absorb!  I don’t even know where to start with recounting the trip.  I would like to do that, though.  Maybe I can just do it in bite-sized chunks, instead of trying to take care of everything in one long entry.

I will try to get to that soon.  For now, I am still just taking things in, and settling in here at home.  I’m finally unpacked, which is nice!  I’d been mostly living out of my big suitcase since early October.  It’s good to use the closet again.

Anyway, stay tuned!

Way too often, I am guilty of taking too lightly the attributes of God.

What I mean is, I “know” that God is everlasting, is merciful, is unfailing, is faithful, and so on. I “know” these things, but do I act like it?

I can’t go real deep here since I really need to get to bed in preparation for an early day tomorrow, but I want to share really quickly something that struck me this evening.

God is unfailing. This means he has not failed, will not fail, and CANNOT fail. Ever! In regards to anything!

I mean, how mind-blowing is that?!

If it is really true that God never fails, then that is incredible! That is life-changing.

The message here is so simple: God does not fail! That’s it.

I should stop being surprised when I see God doing something that I can’t do. I should learn by now that He can do things I can never begin to start to even consider thinking about.

This simple truth really blew me away when I took it literally, wondering, “What if God truly IS unfailing??”

Wow. The truth is so simple. It is always my mistake if I ever try to downplay God’s capabilities, such as thinking, “Well, sure, I know as a rule of thumb that God is in charge and all, but I’m afraid this situation is a bit complex.”

How outlandish, when you consider who I am and who He is! I just marvel at His patience with me as I slowly discover different things that are really so painfully obvious!!

So, to sum it up: God is unfailing, always. Get used to it, and live like it’s true!